


The Feelings in My Head, the Thoughts Behind My Eyes

by ShiroHatzuki



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Alcohol, Alternate Universe - No Killing Game (Dangan Ronpa), Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, I need sleep, M/M, Minor Character Death, POV Multiple, Pining, Travel, a monster of a love song..., but not really like how it is in the canon story, cringe worthy material right here, cuz i literally wrote this story past 10 pm almost every day for 3 months, don't be surprised if everyone gets super ooc, everyone has their talents, heck even the title of this thing was thought of past 10 pm, minor use of language, my friends and i have nicknamed this one 'the story written past 10 pm to prove a point', or 'the 10 pm story' for short, some drink more responsibly than others, this is more of a love song to fatigue and the need to sleep than anything
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-10
Updated: 2018-05-10
Packaged: 2019-05-04 14:36:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 16,258
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14595141
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShiroHatzuki/pseuds/ShiroHatzuki
Summary: Saihara Shuichi had finally graduated college, giving him the opportunity to finally help his long term friend, Amami Rantaro, search for his missing sisters. However, this crucial job that Amami had given him may not be enough to get his mind off of his six year long crush on his friend.





	The Feelings in My Head, the Thoughts Behind My Eyes

**Author's Note:**

> As I've said in the tags, I wrote this story almost purely past 10 p.m. (i did some quick editing -and i do mean editing- in the afternoon because my tired spelling bothered me) in order to prove to someone that I should not be allowed to be productive past 10 p.m. In other words, this is a train wreak. If you find this story to be very terrible 110% of the time, don't worry, I do, too. Please laugh at me along with me so I don't seem as crazy of a sleep-deprived person.

Shuichi watched as the scenery sped by. Akamatsu was driving him and his uncle back from his graduation ceremony. It was hard to believe that he had actually completed what should have been four years of college one year early. He was definitely glad that he took so many college level classes back in high school. The past few years felt like a rollercoaster ride of constant stress and sleep deprivation, and they were over just as quickly. Actually, he could not even remember what his graduation was like even though it had only happened a few minutes ago. Also, he hated roller coasters.

"Hey, Saihara," Akamatsu started, "do you want to stop by Amami's place for a bit? He wanted to congratulate you in person."

"Yeah, sure," Shuichi told her. He hadn't seen Amami in quite some time due to all of the traveling his friend did. If he was able to see his face again... that would be nice.

Amami's house was massive and clearly expensive, with its old European style exterior. That was not to mention the fact that the entire property, which the house took up only about half of, was all fenced in and had a fancy gate in the front. He always said it was just another home, but Shuichi felt that if that house was not a mansion, then the definition of mansion was bull. As they pulled up to the front gate, Shuichi was reminded of the first time he had ever seen it. Back then, he had guessed correctly that Amami's tendency to explore places started with exploring the entirety of the building.

Akamatsu showed off her parallel parking skills before the three climbed out of her bright pink monstrosity of a car. Shuichi's uncle rang the bell by the gate, and a few minutes later, a servant opened the gate for them and led them to the house. Inside, the front entrance was just as Shuichi remembered it to be: big and way too extravagant. The ceiling was high and dome-shaped with a large chandelier hanging down. Along the walls were pillars, and the stone tile floors were polished so much that one could see their reflection perfectly in it. Also, he never found the point of having two different sets of staircases that led to the exact same spot on the second floor. If you really had that much foot traffic on the stairs, then just one large staircase would be enough.

"Saihara!" At that moment, four girls were hurrying down one of the staircases, and all of them had called out Shuichi's surname in chorus when they saw his group enter. He was familiar with all of them, in one way or another, since-

"Think Amami's sisters are going to ask you to play dress up again?" Akamatsu whispered to him, amusement all too apparent in her voice.

"God, I hope not," Shuichi replied. As much as he liked Amami's sisters, he had trouble keeping up with them. It was times like those when he found himself grateful for having prior experience with such a group thanks to his other friends.

The girls greeted Akamatsu and his uncle before turning towards Shuichi. He braced himself as he prepared for the worst. The girls closed in around him, and for too many awkward moments, he suffered through the overly happy and tight embrace of suffocation by Amamis. When they finally finished their deadly greeting and released Shuichi, they began to rapidly fire out different questions and statements. Shuichi's head felt like it was spinning from all of the information it was trying to process at once. At least it was all mostly about their brother, as usual.

"Hey, don't bother Saihara so much, you four."

Speak of the devil. Rantaro Amami himself descended one of the staircases, a smile on his face. He had been smiling a lot ever since Shuichi helped him reunite with four of his sisters. Shuichi could easily imagine that his friend would be bursting with happiness when they found his other eight sisters.

"Don't worry about it," Shuichi told Amami as he approached, "They're fine."

Amami shook his head and chuckled before greeting the other two. Then he quickly whispered something to Akamatsu that Shuichi could not hear.

Whatever was said to her, she seemed to have understood, for she gave a quick nod to Amami. Then she turned to the four sisters and said in her normal, cheery voice, "You girls have been working on something, right? Can you show it to us?"

The four sisters giggled and pulled Akamatsu along with them towards a door located between the stairs. Shuichi's uncle followed them, and Shuichi was about to do the same, but Amami grabbed his wrist, stopping him. "Hey," he started, "do you want to just... I dunno... Sit and chat? We haven't really talked in a while."

Shuichi nodded. He had no idea what the girls were working on, since he had never heard of their project before, but that could wait. Amami had been traveling around god knows where for the past year, and Shuichi himself had been busy with college. He, too, wanted to spend some time catching up with Amami before he left on a whim for yet another journey.

The two sat down on the steps of a staircase and began to catch up on the time that they had missed. However, Amami ended up having to mainly talk about his travels, since even if Shuichi could remember every single second of his last year in college, all he ever did was follow the same routine day in and day out for the entirety of it. Neither of them really minded, though, since Amami always went to fun and exciting places.

"And the real kicker is that he said the fish would last him only two days!" Amami exclaimed as he showed Shuichi a photograph he had taken, "Can you believe it? A fish that size actually only feeding a few people for two days!"

"That really is insane," Shuichi agreed, "I'd have to eat that fish for all three meals a day just to finish it in a week. They must eat well."

"Right?" Amami laughed. God, did that laugh give him life. Then, seeming to notice something, Amami leaned in a bit closer, concern crossing his face. "Hey, Saihara, you're looking a bit tired. Are you feeling alright?"

Shuichi leaned away from his friend a little bit. He realized that the proximity between them was... a bit close. "Y-yeah, I'm fine," he managed to tell Amami. When Amami gave him a frown, he tried to give a reassuring smile, though he was never good at those. "Really, I'm fine, Amami. There's no need to worry about me."

Amami stayed where he was, staring at Shuichi for a few moments. Then, with a sign, he let up. "Whatever you say. Though I'm still worried about you. Also, don't call me 'Amami' so much. My entire family goes by that name, you know, so it'll get confusing if you address us all that way."

That was true. Shuichi had been avoiding calling out to one of them as much a he could, though he did once call to the brother and all five Amamis turned around. "I would stop, but you also call me by my surname, you know," he pointed out. That was not the only reason why he did not want to call his friend by his given name, but if he said that other reason aloud, he felt that he would probably die from embarrassment.

"Yeah, I guess that's true," Amami confirmed before, with a smirk, saying, "Maybe I should try saying your name some time." Lord knew how the very thought of Amami doing that of all things would send Shuichi over the edge. Was his face starting to flush? Probably, he guessed. Amami brought his face closer once more and started sounding out the first syllable of Shuichi's name. "Shhh... Shhuuu..." he teased. Shuichi's heart rate felt like it went from fifty to a thousand in an instant. Was he really going to say it? Amami slowly sounded out more of his name, getting to the second syllable after seconds that felt like decades.

Then he suddenly sat back. "Nah, maybe not now." Oh. Shuichi caught himself feeling ever so slightly disappointed before crushing the thought. "C'mon, let's see what the others are up to," Amami suggested, standing. With some reluctance, Shuichi followed his lead and the two headed towards the door.

However, right before Shuichi went to open the door, he heard some low voices from the other side. He wondered about just what the girls were planning.

"Saihara? Is something up?" Shuichi turned back to face Amami, who flashed him a kind, reassuring smile. "Go on in. Everyone's been working on this for a while."

Everyone? Shuichi turned back and cautiously opened the door.

He did not expect to be met with party poppers and almost twenty voices.

"Congratulations!"

In the large living room, fourteen of his former high school classmates and closest friends stood before, clapping and cheering. Above them was a large banner with the words "CONGRATULATIONS ON GRADUATING, SAIHARA" written across it. Did they all gather together just for him?

Akamatsu, who stood directly in front of him, was wearing a bright grin. "It's tough to do what you did, so we thought we'd throw you a surprise party to reward you and your hard work."

Chabashira approached him next. "Even though you're a guy, you're not that bad, so you deserve some praise for a job well done." She then turned to Amami and simply told him, "Good work on taking your damn sweet time, degenerate male."

Shuichi saw Amami wince at her words before chuckling a bit. By that time, they were all familiar with how harsh Chabashira was towards men. "Thanks, Chabashira," Amami told her.

"Gonta really was worried about Saihara taking long time getting here," Gokuhara commented in his usual caveman-like speech, "Earlier, Ouma said something about Saihara being eaten up by Amami. Gonta glad that Amami didn't turn to cannibalism."

While Shuichi did not quite understand what his big friend meant, he heard Ouma's signature mischievous laughter, so he decided to stay out of the tomfoolery of his friends.

Suddenly, Shuichi felt himself being pulled forward, and he stumbled slightly, trying to keep his balance. He quickly deduced that Momota had wrapped one arm around him in a sort of head lock.

"Glad you could make it, bro!" Momota cheered, ruffling up Shuichi's hair. "It's good to see one of my sidekicks do something as awesome as they are."

Harukawa, who was standing close to Momota, shook her head while muttering, "I'm not your other sidekick." Momota had been calling her and Shuichi his "sidekicks" ever since high school. Shuichi became used to the term after a while, and it even felt like a term of endearment from their boisterous friend, seeing as how he always made an effort for them because of it. He had a feeling Harukawa felt the same way.

Eventually, everyone had come up to Shuichi to give their own personal message, though not all of them were even related to his graduation. He did not mind that at all, since he had known his friends for long enough to not need such formalities. He would choose to just mess around with them over having to be on guard with each other on almost any given day.

"Enough with the boring shit and bring out the booze already!" Iruma roared, her face impatient.

"Calm down, Iruma," Tojo told her in her usual composed manner, "I'll bring out the drinks when it gets darker out. Just settle for water for now."

Iruma pouted and sulked off, to which Ouma snickered at. "Good thinking, Tojo. That bitch would've gotten smashed before we even had a chance to get Saihara drunk off his ass."

"Wha- But I don't want to?" Shuichi replied, unsure if Ouma was joking or not. He hoped he was.

Then someone else joined the conversation, then another, and soon, Amami's living room was filled with the sound of over a dozen 21-year olds talking and even shouting at eachother. Shuichi had no idea how just one comment could escalate into such a mess of noise nor did he know how to reply to the questions he received about driving and tabloids and ritual sacrifice all at once. Funny, he used to be good at dealing with situations that were even busier than that. Why was his head reeling from the information that was coming at it now?

He was guided aside by someone, bringing him out of the range of the others' conversations. That gave him time to think on everything. Actually, he had no idea how he could even remotely relate to tabloids and ritual sacrifice. And how was that person playing her piano while talking with someone? He did know the piano player, right? God, he wished he was running on more than the few cups of coffee he had so many hours ago. Someone tall and handsome was talking to him, but it seemed like it was through a tunnel. He certainly could not make out what the other young man was saying. But he should respond, so not to be rude. Yeah, he would respond.

As soon as the room stopped spinning.

-

Rantaro sat on a stool as he peered down at Saihara's resting face. Somehow, the entire party had become very lively very quickly, as it usually did with the large group of friends, and he had noticed that Saihara was becoming overwhelmed by Kiibo, Shirogane, and Yonaga all trying to talk to him and each other at once. He had managed to pull his friend away from the confusing conversation, and he tried to ask him if he was feeling alright once he did so, but Saihara was unresponsive for a few brief moments before responding by collapsing to the floor. Well, it was not necessarily a direct response, but he got the answer to his question when he knelt down and found that Saihara was out cold.

"We should send Saihara to a hospital soon, Amami," Tojo suggested, her gentle tone bringing Rantaro out of his thoughts. "Even though I do have some basic knowledge in nursing, it's probably best to have the professionals take care of him."

Rantaro nodded. Saihara's uncle said that his nephew had been overworking himself due to college, so the sleep deprivation and general fatigue was probably catching up to him. Tojo had put an IV drip she had found earlier in the house into Saihara's arm. Rantaro did not know that the house had an IV drip in a storage room, but his father said that he always had stuff "just in case," including the unused IV drip.

"God, to think he'd be knocked out like this without even tasting a drop of alcohol," Iruma murmured from behind him

Rantaro turned to look at all of his friends who had managed to cram into the bedroom. Right after Saihara had fainted, everyone had panicked when they saw that their favorite personification of that awkward emo phase was down for the count. It was a good thing that Saihara's uncle was used to dealing with serious situations on the fly, for he calmly told Rantaro and Tojo what he suspected was up and what his nephew needed. One of those things had been a bed, so only half thinking about what he was doing, Rantaro had carried Saihara up to his bedroom to rest while Tojo retrieved the IV drip. Actually, when he thought about it, if Saihara was in his bed- No, wait, now was probably not the time to think about those things. Anyways, long story short, Saihara's uncle had managed to calm everyone down to the point where they would not wake a dead man when they entered the room, which was probably a good thing for Saihara, though he was sure they were just as worried sick about their friend as he was.

"He's a pretty pathetic guy if he can't even take care of himself correctly," Chabashira commented.

"Come on, that's no way to talk about Saihara," Akamatsu gently reprised her, "He's been working really hard so he can help his uncle, you know. You can cut him a little slack." Chabashira gave a small pout, but did not say anything else.

"Chabashira's partially right, though," Kiibo pointed out, "He could have asked for some help with anything about college. We would've helped him out."

While the others discussed the topic further, Rantaro decided that it would be best to not mention that most of them probably would have only hindered Saihara's studies. Though, he also wondered why Saihara even went to college, since his friend's career was already there for him. Heck, he was already practically working in his uncle's detective office. Maybe there was some sort of law? Or maybe his uncle had a certain policy? He decided to ask Saihara himself when he woke up.

After some time had passed, the others slowly filtered out of the room. Saihara's uncle did pop in once, but he said that there was no need for a hospital trip, so long as his nephew got some rest. To Rantaro, it seemed like the older man was experienced with people collapsing from exhaustion. Rantaro was pretty sure most of his friends had left for home, with the exception of Tojo, who worked as a maid for his family. He was the only one who stayed in the room with Saihara.

His friend looked so peaceful when he was asleep compared to how pale and tired his face was when they were talking earlier. Rantaro reached over and brushed aside a few strands of Saihara's long, raven-black hair. He sort of wished that Saihara would at least clip his hair back, since he had a nice face. And when those golden eyes opened again... Rantaro suppressed his mind from thinking any further. For the moment, he settled for holding onto Saihara's hand. He often did nail art and such, so it wouldn't come off as weird, right?

He was glad that he was not traveling at the time, at least. Had Saihara collapsed when he was not there, he did not know what he would do.

-

He felt comfortable. Around him, he was embraced by softness, warmth. A bed. A hand equal to the quality of the bed sheets gingerly held his own. Enveloped in a familiar scent, he felt like he had made it to heaven. Maybe he should let this comfort lull him back to sleep...?

"Good morning, Saihara," he heard a voice say to him.

Shuichi slowly opened his sleepy eyes to see a mess of green hair and piercings by his side, those lips a gentle smile. He returned that smile and replied, "Morning, Amami." How comforting it was to have his friend by his bedside...

Wait.

"Amami?!" Now Shuichi was wide awake, bolting up right in shock. Which then turned out to not be a good decision, since the sudden movement left his vision hazy and his head spinning for a few moments.

"Ah, be careful," Amami warned him a bit too late.

When his head felt relatively normal again, Shuichi asked the other young man, "What are you doing here?" However, he was already taking in his situation. Firstly, he was not in his bed. He noticed that there was an IV drip hooked up to his arm. If his memory was correct, he was in... Amami's room? And -oh God- Amami was holding his hand. He supposed the real question that he needed to ask was what he himself was doing there.

"Earlier you collapsed at your congratulatory party," Amami explained to him, "We ended up carrying you up to my room, and Tojo put that IV in your arm."

"Oh. I see." He could faintly remember something like the others surprising him with a party like that, though his tired memories were not very clear. "Sorry. I caused a lot of trouble for everyone."

"Not really," Amami told him, "I mean, yeah, everyone freaked out a bit, but your uncle managed to get the situation under control. By the way, do you feel like you need to, like, go to a hospital or something? Have a professional look at you and what not?"

Shuichi shook his head. "No, I should be fine. It's probably from fatigue, so I just need some sleep." Thanks to the fact that he took six or seven classes at once per semester, he never had much of a chance to sleep, often only catching a few 30 minute naps at odd hours.

"Alright, if you say so." Amami's face looked like he was not very convinced, but he dropped the topic. However, his grip on Shuichi's hand tightened, and Shuichi had to suppress the urge to pull away because he did not get many chances to actually touch Amami without it seeming weird, and he was also curious as to why his friend was holding his hand in the first place. "Well, the party's obviously cancelled, but I'm sure the others would want to throw a proper one soon," Amami mused.

Oh, right. That party was for him, and he seemed to have fainted right when it started. "Sorry about that. Where are the others? I should apologize to them, too."

"They left a while ago," Amami told him, "though I don't think you even need to apologize to them, and you don't need to do so to me, either. So long as our Saihara is okay, then we're happy."

"There's no way you guys all think that," Shuichi laughed.

"You're right in that I can't speak for everyone," replied Amami, "but I know that I feel that way." The eyes he looked at Shuichi with were wide with sincerity. Those eyes made Shuichi want to not only believe his friend, but to confess right on the spot that-

He lowered his head and averted his own eyes, knowing his face was flushing from the things his mind was conjuring up. "I-I'm not even that great at taking care of my chores, so I can't handle a responsibility like that," he managed to say.

Amami stared at him for a few moments, not saying a word. Then, lowering his gaze, he quietly muttered something Shuichi could only catch a bit of. "... care of you."

Care for what now? "Sorry, what was that?" Shuichi queried, curious.

However, Amami shook his head and said, "It's nothing. Don't worry about it." Shuichi wanted to probe further, perhaps due to his tendency to find the truth, but he felt it was his turn to drop the topic.

Amami suddenly stood up from the seat, letting go of Shuichi's hand in the process. "I'll contact the others to let them know you're alive," he told Shuichi lightheartedly, though his words came out quicker than normal, "It's getting late, so you'd probably want to head home, right? I'll contact your uncle if you want."

When Amami mentioned how it was getting late, Shuichi realized something. "Hey, Amami, what's the time right now?"

"Huh? Oh, it's..." Amami glanced at his watch. "... Two in the morning."

Shuichi's eyes widened with shock. He had arrived some time in the afternoon, which meant he had been out cold for a very long time. Knowing he had allowed himself to sleep for so long made him anxious, like he still had a schedule full of work to complete. Also, he had used his friend's bed for all of that time, keeping Amami from sleeping. He could see that fact with bags forming under Amami's eyes. That only added another knife of guilt being stabbed into his gut.

"S-sorry," he sputtered out. He had to get going. He had already caused enough trouble. "I'll leave right now. Is there a car that I can borrow? I promise I'll return it-"

"Saihara," Amami interrupted, his voice gentle but firm, "It's okay. You need rest. You can even spend the night if you want to. Just... Relax."

Shuichi shook his head. Yes, he was panicking, but he did not want to be any more of a nuisance to Amami. "You've already done so much for me, I can't-"

"Are you hungry?"

The question was so sudden that Shuichi was caught off guard. "Kind of," he answered before immediately wishing he could take back his words since he knew what Amami was going to do.

The other turned towards the door, throwing the words "I'll make something quick" over his shoulder before heading out. Great job at not being more of a nuisance, Shuichi scolded himself. Alone in Amami's room -and in his bed, no less- he decided on the best course of action to take next. It probably would not end well if he left while his friend was gone. He did not want Amami to hate him, nor did he have any means of transportation that could get him home quickly, since he did not want to steal anything from the Amami family and his uncle was probably sound asleep at that hour. Also, knowing Amami, he would probably be forced back to bed if he got up to help him. That would just cause more trouble. In the end, Shuichi decided that staying in bed and waiting for Amami was the best option he had at the moment.

Some long moments later, Amami came back with a plate full of sandwiches that looked simple but good. "It's not much," he said as he put the plate down on a nightstand, "but I hope you like it."

"Thank you," Shuichi replied as he took a sandwich. Biting into it, he could tell that all of the ingredients were the most expensive things ones could find, and it was just some lettuce, ham, and cheese. As much as he loved the Amami family, god damn rich people.

"So, what are you going to do now that you're up?" Amami asked, carefully taking the IV drip out of Shuichi's arm.

"Well, we can't call my uncle to come get me," Shuichi pointed out, "He sleeps like a rock."

"That's one option down." Amami grabbed a sandwich from the plate before sitting on the stool by the bed. "The others would probably get pissed if we called them so late at night, too, even if they were worried about you."

"And you're sure you don't have a car I can borrow?" Shuichi queried.

His friend shook his head. "My parents have a car, but they're sleeping right now, so no dice."

With no options left, Shuichi's stomach felt like it was doing flips. "Oh... Then that means..." He did not want to say the meaning out loud, since he was not sure if his joy or his nerves would kill him first if his conclusion was right.

"Do you... Want to spend the night?" Amami asked, his voice quiet, as if telling a secret.

And there it was. Shuichi frantically searched for a response. "Uh, yea- I mean, sure, I'd- if that's alright," he struggled to say. Thank God that he had given up on trying to keep his cool around Amami years ago.

"Cool. Then I'll be on the couch downstairs if you need me," Amami told him, starting to stand once more.

"No, wait!" Amami stopped at Shuichi's words. "I can't let you do that."

The other raised an eyebrow. "Then should I sleep here on the floor?"

Shuichi shook his head. "Please don't do that, either. I'll stay somewhere else."

"No, you're not getting out of bed," Amami retorted, just as he had predicted, "You just need to rest there until the morning."

"But I'm the one who took your bed. I don't want to make you sleep elsewhere."

"What's with that? Should I sleep in the bed with you, then?"

Shuichi opened his mouth, but he could not form the words. He knew he should say no and insist he move somewhere else, but a voice inside his head was screaming "yes." The words caught in his throat as the idea of sharing a bed with Amami crept into his mind. For a few moments, there was an awkward silence as he gave up on trying to say something and turned his face away in hopes that his friend would not see how his face was flushing.

Eventually, Amami sighed and said, "I'll be in a guest room. Goodnight, Saihara." As he stood and turned to leave, Shuichi watched him out of the corner of his eye. Even when the Amami had long since gone, Shuichi just stared at the closed door.

After some time had passed, Shuichi flopped back down onto the bed. He guessed that he had messed up once again. He had long since given up on asking Amami out, but no matter what, his feelings remained. Ever since high school began, he had tried every safe option available to fall out of love with his friend, but those never worked. Having a crush on someone for six years seemed pretty ridiculous to Shuichi, but for some reason or another, his was always there.

He pulled the blanket up to his face and let Amami's scent lull him to sleep.

 

" ... -hara. Saihara." A gentle but serious voice pulled Shuichi from his slumber. He slightly opened his eyes to see a young woman by his side. "Good morning, Saihara," Tojo said as he propped himself up on one arm, "It's time to get up."

Shuichi rubbed his tired eyes. "G'morning, Tojo," he replied, his tongue still laced with sleep. He was about to ask why Tojo was there, but he stopped when he remembered that he had agreed to stay the night at the Amami house. The memories of the previous night flooded into his head, and he wished that his blush was less obvious than it felt.

"Breakfast will be waiting for you downstairs," Tojo went on to carefully tell him, "I've prepared a change of clothes for you, and they should be in the bathroom. You know where it is, right?" She paused to let Shuichi nod his response. "Also, Amami -ah, Rantaro Amami- went ahead to contact everyone to let them know that you're okay. Akamatsu and Shinguji should becoming over soon. Though, your uncle said that he will not see you until this evening."

"That's probably because he has work to do," Shuichi explained, "It's better if he gets it out of the way now instead of regretting it later."

"You have a good point," Tojo commented, "Then perhaps I should prepare a ride home for you so you don't have to wait for you uncle."

"There's no need to do that." Shuichi knew Tojo was hired by the Amami family as a maid, and ever since high school, she had always acted a bit like one. However, this was his first time seeing her in her full work persona, and he was caught off guard by how much work Tojo was doing for him. And he thought she was spoiling them back in high school. "Do you... always do this?" he asked.

"Pardon?"

"You know... Waking everyone up, laying out their clothes, etcetera," he clarified.

"Oh, no, not all the time. Rantaro Amami usually takes care of his morning routine himself," Tojo explained. "The girls are also trying to become more independent. Mister Amami sometimes need some help waking up on time for work, but he can also do the rest on his own. I mostly cook and clean."

"I... see..." To Shuichi, it seemed like she was doing that personalized service thing she always used to do. Some things never change, he thought.

Tojo excused herself and left as Shuichi climbed out of bed. Stretching, he too left the room to get ready. Once he had showered and dressed, he headed downstairs towards the dining room. He briefly reflected on how lucky he was to have visited the home many times prior to that day, since the place was almost maze like with all of it's doors.

At the dining room table, Shuichi saw that Amami and his four sisters were sitting there, already midway through their breakfast. He also noticed a bright, blonde-headed girl and a man with extremely long, dark hair and a mask covering his mouth sitting with them, chatting away about some topic he had yet to catch.

He considered for a moment how he should enter the group before deciding that announcing his presence would have the least amount of consequences. "Good morning, Amamis, Akamatsu, Shinguji," he greeted as he approached the table.

"Good morning, Saihara," Akamatsu and Shinguji said in unison. The Amami girls were quick to follow their lead.

Rantaro Amami shook his head with a good humored smile. "Why did you make our name plural?" he laughed before giving his morning greeting.

One of the sisters indicated to an empty seat with food already in front of it, and Shuichi took that as a queue to sit in it. "Sorry for stealing your bed last night," he apologized to Amami once he had situated himself.

"Don't worry about it," Amami assured him, "All the beds in this house are the same, anyways, so it didn't matter where we slept." Akamatsu and Shinguji gave Shuichi curious glances, to which he did his best to avoid because HE KNEW WHAT THEY MEANT. However, they seemed to drop the matter, since Akamatsu pulled Shuichi into the previous conversation about music around the world, which he could not really contribute to, since he neither knew much about music or culture.

At some point, the Amami sisters finished their food and left. Around that time, Akamatsu asked, "Say, where's Tojo?"

"That's right, we haven't seen her yet this morning," Shinguji pointed out. When he thought about it, Shuichi realized that he hadn't seen Tojo since she left Amami's room earlier.

"Oh, she's probably running around the house, cleaning and stuff," Amami explained, rolling his eyes, "We tell her to chill with the cleaning, but she insists on doing pretty much all of the house work. It's kind of scary how she can do so much and not die like Saihara did yesterday, actually." He smiled at that last part, telling them that it was meant to be taken lightly. "She should be here soon."

As if on queue, the woman in question entered the dining room, her gait floating with elegance as if she hadn't been running around the entire house cleaning. (Though there was no doubt in Shuichi's mind that she most certainly did do the housework with expert care.) "Good morning," Tojo greeted as she approached the table, "I didn't expect you two to arrive this early, Akamatsu, Shinguji. Should I make some food for both of you?"

"Thank you, Tojo, but we already ate breakfast at a cafe before coming here," Shinguji told her.

"Well, with that settled, Tojo can drop her business face," Amami put in, "After all, we're just a bunch of buddies meeting to make sure one of us won't be going six feet under early." Shuichi gave another apology as he laughed softly with the others. Amami's sense of humor was a bit odd, but it was yet another thing Shuichi loved about his friend.

The five began to catch up on what they had been doing for the past year. Akamatsu had been playing the piano for a traveling orchestra, and the group was going on a tour around the country some time later that month. Shinguji, not being suicidal like Shuichi, was preparing for his fourth year in college.

"And Tojo is still busy working under Amami?" Shinguji queried as he turned to the maid.

"That's right," Tojo confirmed.

"So what's the best part about working as a maid for my family?" Amami asked Tojo in a joking tone.

"Amami hasn't given you too much trouble, has he?" Akamatsu's expression seemed worried, which seemed fitting considering how surprisingly stubborn the young man was.

Tojo let out a low hum as she thought for a moment. "I would have to say the best part about Amami is not taking care of him, since he's never home."

"Aw, don't be like that," Amami whined, and the other four laughed. While Tojo was a very polite and serious girl, her humor tended to be more cynical, which, in its own way, was hilarious.

"It's the truth, though," Tojo pointed out, "This past year was much more peaceful thanks to having one less mouth raid the fridge every other night."

"Hey, last night wasn't just because I was hungry," Amami countered.

"But you'll admit that it played a part in it?" Tojo shot back without skipping a beat. Amami opened his mouth, but he closed it without making a sound and hung his head, defeated.

"Oh, yeah. Didn't you say you had something to help find another one of your sisters?" Akamatsu suddenly asked, her sloppy change of the subject most likely for saving Amami from a lecture from Tojo. Shuichi had also heard Amami's message about having a lead to find another one of the eight sisters his friend was still missing. Having promised to help Amami in his search, he was curious as to what the clue would be and what it had to say about the case.

"Yes, I do," Amami confirmed, "Hold on." He stood from the table and hurried out of the room, only to come back a few minutes later with a file folder.

Amami sat back down as he placed the folder on the table. Shuichi took that opportunity to open the folder to see what was inside. Neatly packed away were papers, documents, and polaroids all based around one girl. "So this is one of the older sisters?" he queried as he carefully shuffled through the papers.

"Yeah. We went swimming once while on vacation here, but she wasn't there when we went back to the hotel," Amami told him, his eyes distant, as if he was reliving the past in that moment. "We couldn't find her even after two and a half weeks of searching."

Shuichi nodded his understanding, but Amami probably did not notice. Judging by the story and the background of most of the pictures, he figured that they would be searching another tropical island. He noted with a mental sigh that the family seemed to visit a lot of places that were hot and humid: the two adjectives he hated the most. Oh well, he thought, all in the name of friendship and love.

"When will we be embarking on our search?" Shinguji asked.

Amami took a moment to think before suggesting, "How about in a week from now?"

A week was plenty of time to prepare, Shuichi thought. Usually, he, Amami, and Shinguji would pack a few pairs of clothes and then hop onto the Amami family's yacht: probably one of the only things with an engine the both Shinguji and Amami would get on.

"Should we prepare a farewell party for you three?" Tojo asked, though Shuichi thought he heard a hint of sarcasm in her voice.

"We're only going to be gone for a month, not forever," Amami pointed out, "A going away party makes it seem like we'll leave forever."

"But if we throw a going away party, then we won't regret not doing it if you guys go missing," Akamatsu brought up.

"You sound like you want to get rid of us," Amami observed.

Shuichi knew that, in the end, all of their friends would see them off in some manner, as they did back when they went on their expeditions in high school.

When their plans were finalized, Akamatsu and Shinguji said their goodbyes before heading off to go about their days. Shuichi wanted to help his uncle with the office's current investigation before he set out on his own, so he too bid farewell to his friends with the promise of having his clothes returned to him when they embarked on their travels. As he walked to the bus stop a few blocks away from the Amami mansion, Shuichi could not help but be giddy with excitement for another trip with his friends.

-

Rantaro sat in the middle of a plush, pastel pink rug, surrounded by his four sisters as they brushed nail polish onto his nails. He was always at his happiest when he could spend time with his sisters like this, and the prospect of adding another sister back into his happiness made his heart soar. For years he had searched for the day when he could have all twelve of his sisters back, and he knew that if he had the assistant detective named Shuichi Saihara by his side, then the day would be upon him in time.

One of the girls asked about the hat that he had left in the corner of the room. He explained that it was a surprise gift for someone, so he needed his sisters to not tell a single soul about it. With some low giggles, they agreed to keep their mouths shut.

Rantaro would need to move the hat later. He had bought it while on his travels with a particular someone in mind. He decided that hiding the hat in his room was probably a better idea than leaving it to his sisters' mercy. He had only brought the hat to the room out of habit, since he used to buy things for no one but his sisters. Oh, how times have changed.

-

As Shuichi climbed out of his uncle's car, he saw numerous figures standing by the pier. He guessed that they were mostly his friends. Amami jogged over to help him with his belongings, which were a single suitcase and an off-white duffle bag that was slung over his shoulder, across his chest. Their greetings were brief, but for Shuichi, who had not had the opportunity to see Amami for a week, it was enough.

All of Shuichi's friends bombarded him with their comments as soon as he was in earshot of them, their words ranging from wishes for safe travels to telling him not to pass out in the middle of the ocean to saying that his funeral was already planned for when he accidentally killed himself. It was such a great feeling to know that his friends were already detailing how they would use his corpse for whatever illegal things they had on their minds. Which is to say that he wished Yonaga would stop talking about ritual sacrifice and no, he would not appreciate his organs being sold on the black market if they found his body.

 

Shuichi climbed aboard the yacht by the dock to find the Shinguji was already there. "Hi," he greeted, and the other only nodded his response. If Shuichi was to be honest, he was not as close to Shinguji as he was with his other former classmates. There was something about the man that was... off. Of course, that never stopped him from trying to get along with him, and they always had interesting conversations when they could get one going.

Amami shortly followed Shuichi onto the yacht. "Are we ready to go?" he asked with a smile.

Shuichi nodded, and Shinguji said, "I'll control the yacht first."

Amami raised an eyebrow. "Do you remember how to?"

"Of course," Shinguji replied as he peered over the railing of the yacht to waved goodbye to their friends one last time. A chorus of blessings and farewells could be heard in reply from the pier.

While Shinguji left to get them going, Amami and Shuichi stayed out on the deck of the yacht. All of their friends and families were there, waving and saying goodbye in some form. They waved back in reply and continued to do so until they had left the pier.

"So, do you plan on getting sunburn again?" Amami joked as the land disappeared over the horizon.

Shuichi let out a chuckle. Due to the fact that he never went outside much, his skin was fairly pale and was easily burnt. "No, I brought sunblock this time. I'll put it on now."

However, before he could go into the yacht's cabin, Amami took out a tube of sunblock, squirted some onto his hands, and then proceeded to shove it into Shuichi's face. "H-hey!" he exclaimed as Amami started to rub the sunblock all over his face, "That's cold!"

"Hold still," his friend laughed. Shuichi complied, though with some reluctance. He may have craved Amami's touch, but that did not mean he liked being treated like a little kid.

Amami eventually put sunblock on every inch of exposed skin on Shuichi's head and he even covered the back of his neck, which made Shuichi jump. "Th-thanks," Shuichi managed out.

But Amami was not done yet. His friend dug through a bag he had lazily discarded on the deck and pulled out something weaved of straw with a wide brim. "Here," he said, placing the hat atop Shuichi's head, "This should also help a bit with the sun."

Shuichi fumbled around with the hat on his head. It was different from the baseball cap he was used to wearing, but he could see that Amami's gift was more functionally efficient, with the brim shading his entire head. If only it did not obscure his sight so much.

"Not like that, silly." With some more of that musical laughter, Amami adjusted the hat so it would still provided his face with some shade but also let him see in front of him.

This revealed a perfect view of Amami with the morning sun directly behind him, casting a shadow over his face while simultaneously creating a halo of light around his figure. Shuichi stood there, taking in every detail, from the way Amami's multiple earrings reflected the sunlight to the way the corner of his eyes wrinkled slightly as he smiled. This man was more blinding than any amount of light, Shuichi thought.

His friend cocked his head to the side slightly, a curious look in his eyes. "What's up?"

In that moment, Shuichi snapped out of his trance. "Oh, uh, s-sorry..." He hurriedly turned his head away, mentally begging the heat in his cheeks to go away. How could he get so caught up in his feelings that he lost himself? Of course, this was Amami, so-

"... Want to head inside?" Amami offered. Shuichi, still trying to recover from his embarrassment, only nodded and followed his friend into the cabin space of the yacht.

He cursed himself for not being able to properly interact with Amami even after six years.

-

Ever since they went on their first outing together, Korekiyo Shinguji knew that his two friends were pinning for each other. Of course, he had his suspicions before that summer, but when it was just the three of them, he sat back and watched their true feelings unfold in scenes hidden from the rest of the world. How Saihara would flush at every other action Amami did. How Amami would search for Saihara as if his lifeline was tied to the boy. How they both stared with starry eyes at the other when they thought the other was not looking. Korekiyo was no expert on human emotions, but all of his years of observing how people lived gave him more than enough knowledge to know that those two were in love. His other friends were quick to pick up on the situation, as well, which was unsurprising, since their efforts to hide their feelings were quite mediocre. At some point, Saihara gave up on hiding his feelings for Amami from everyone but Amami himself, and though the other was much more of a challenge to figure out, Korekiyo figured that he also caught on that his crush was a public secret. Because he tended to spend many of his breaks traveling with them, he ended up being a person that they frequently went to when they needed to vent their emotions.

It seemed like that day was not going to be an exception.

"Am I doing something wrong?" Amami asked with a frustrated sigh as he seated himself. The two had set up a folding table and chairs in the middle of the control room and had spread out multiple pamphlets and books on their destination on the table. Korekiyo had already set the yacht on the correct course, so he had no need to actually steer the vessel for a while.

"Could you clarify?" Korekiyo requested, though he already had a fairly good guess of what had Amami upset.

"Whenever it's just me and Saihara, I always end up making him freak out. Am I too overbearing? Is that why he's uncomfortable around me?" Amami buried his face in his hands as he spoke, clearly distressed.

Korekiyo let out a low hum, pretending to think hard about the answer. "Is he not usually like that, though?" he queried.

"Well, yeah, he's not good at talking with people, but he always talks more naturally with you guys. Heck, he can even talk with me better when one of you are around. What's up with that?"

"Perhaps he doesn't trust you still?" Of course Korekiyo knew that the suggestion was ludicrous. Amami was one of the people Saihara would trust the most.

"If that's the case, then wouldn't he be more weary of you?" Amami shot back, "You're a pretty creepy guy, especially with how much you watch people."

Korekiyo let out a chuckle. He could not deny that his usual actions would be considered odd by most people. "I suppose so. Does the fact that he can't act calm around you make you love him any less?"

Amami groaned. "No, and that's the real problem. He gets all red when he tries to talk, and he starts stuttering, and he he does that thing where he tries to hide his embarrassment, and even though I don't want to make him uncomfortable, he's just so damn cute when he's flustered that I might do something."

Korekiyo mentally cursed. Amami was so close to realizing Saihara's feelings for him, but it was not close enough. He wanted to scream at his friend to stop being so dense, but he was meant only to observe, not influence the results. Also, he decided to not figure out what the something mentioned was. "I'm sure he'll warm up to you more," he assured Amami, "After all, he already has, in a way."

"I know." Amami sighed once more. "It's just that... It's been six years. Does he hate me?"

"I don't think so." 'Hate' was far from the truth. "He wouldn't be helping you as he is now if he did."

"I guess..." Amami closed his book and let out yet another sigh.

"Why do you want Saihara to be able to talk with you easily?" Korekiyo queried, "Aside from... Whatever else you planned on doing."

Amami's eyes looked a little distant, and he wore a goofy grin. Korekiyo knew he was off in his own little world. "Well, I just thought that if Saihara were more comfortable with me, then maybe I could... You know..."

"No, I don't know." He knew exactly what it was. He was tempted to say that their friend would be more comfortable with the other if Amami just confessed for Christ's sake. But no, saying that would go against his way of doing things. And besides, throughout their six years, he could tell the two were getting close to a turning point in their relationship without his help, so he did not want to intervene and potentially ruin everything.

It was tough to watch, but he was determined to see how well or how tragically his friends' relationship ended.

-

"Humanity has invented machines with the purpose of making commuting quicker and more convenient, and yet we still are going to travel by foot."

"Yep," Shinguji and Amami replied in unison. The three were walking through a tropical forest along narrow, barely visible paths created only by the miniscule amount of people on the island passing through. Shuichi wished his friend would explore less cramped and confusing places with so much stuff in it, like the very forest they were in, but then that would not be Amami. Of course, that didn't mean that he liked not being able to use his driver's license for his comfort's sake. Even with the tree cover, he could feel the heat of the environment, and he wanted out of it.

"I'm pretty sure that guy said the village is around here," Amami announced, checking his compass and map.

"How do we know that he wasn't trying to trick us?" Shinguji asked.

"When it's not here," the other told him simply, picking up his pace. If they were able to reach the village of the indigenous people, they hoped that doing so would direct them in the direction of where Amami's sister was.

Thankfully for them, the village was in fact there, and people were up and moving as they went about their lives. With a quick look around, Shuichi could tell that the people had been touched ever so slightly by Westernization from the clothing the children wore and some of the material that was used to build the huts, but that was the extent of the modern life he had know that he could see. Women were cooking over open fires outside, men were bringing back fish contained in homemade baskets, and the homes were small and fairly open for neighbors to stop by.

"Hello!" a woman called to the group in English heavily laced with her native tongue, "Can we help you boys?"

It was times like those when Shuichi was most grateful for Shinguji's skills with people of all cultures and Amami's elite training, since he would have been completely lost on how to respond. "Hello," Shinguji replied to the woman as they approached her, "We are looking for some help with finding the sister of this man." He indicated to Amami. "If it is not too much trouble, could you help us?"

The woman stared at Amami for a moment before leaning in closer. Amami backed up a bit, but the woman continued to observe his face. "Yes, this face looks familiar," she decided at at last, "You look like the girl who has been here for many years."

"Girl?" Amami queried.

"Yes," replied the woman, "She came many years ago and has been with us since. Back then, she was cold and tired and running. She had come to this island with her family, but she said some men kidnapped her. She escaped and found us. My family went with her back into the town, but her family had already left, so she now lives with us until her family returns."

Amami glanced over to Shinguji and Shuichi, his eyes shimmering with hope. "Could you take us to her?" Shinguji asked the woman.

The woman nodded in response and led the three to a hut. There, children were waiting inside along with a girl who did not look like the others in the village. "Here she is," the woman announced.

When the girl and Amami locked eyes, they did not say a word nor did they move. The two simply stood across from each other, staring. The others held their breaths, waiting for what would happen next.

After some time had passed, the girl spoke up, her voice barely audible. "Rantaro?"

At that, Amami's face cracked into a bright smile overflowing with joy. "Yeah." The two rushed towards each other for a tight embrace, the two crying the other's names as if to make up for their years of separation. Shuichi found that he, too, was smiling at the scene. Another happy success.

That evening, after the now found sister had said her goodbyes and Amami thanked every single person in the village, the group of now four were walking back to their yacht, the Amami siblings holding hands so not to lose eachother again. Along the way, Amami's sister filled them in on her part of the story.

"They kidnapped me to hold me for ransom, but I escaped before they could even bring me to their sketchy hideout," she told them proudly.

Amami chuckled. "I wouldn't have expected anything less from you," he said, "You always did manage to escape when we weren't looking."

Looking at the two, Shuichi could not help but feel a bit lonely, though he tried to push away the feeling. Amami was with his long lost sister again. He was going to head home with his close friends by his side. What was there to feel lonely about? However, the urge to grab a hold of Amami's other hand still persisted.

He adjusted his hat. Love was making him foolish, selfish, greedy. And honestly, he was scared of what was hidden within that foolish side of himself.

-

Over the course of a year, Rantaro traveled the globe at a much higher rate than he would normally. Actually, he was pretty sure most people would advise against traveling so much. His friends certainly did. However, he could not stop. Saihara was finally free to help him find his sisters as much as they pleased, and he felt an urge to take advantage of this opportunity as much as possible. When they were in high school, Saihara helped him find three of his sisters during their breaks. When the aspiring detective was in college, he still helped Rantaro when he had free time, but it was indirect and frankly inefficient, since it was difficult for the boy to assess everything when Rantaro could only send him so much, leading to only one more sister being found. Saihara preformed best when he could get his hands dirty, and Rantaro preferred to travel with his friend by his side.

Of course, their search may have taken a shorter amount of time had Rantaro decided to use the more efficient plan of finding every sister in one trip around the world, but he was paranoid. After they all went missing because of the little adventures the family took in the past, he did not want to risk losing them after having just found them, so he and Saihara would find them, take them back home immediately, then rest for a week or so before leaving once more.

Then they had been on their search for over a year. Rantaro glanced behind him to see Shinguji and Saihara following his lead. The three were heading towards a forest full of vegetation that they had grown somewhat familiar by then. Rantaro was glad Shinguji was there to help find the last sister: the youngest one, who had been lost for the longest amount of time. He was grateful for the extra help with the search, but he was guilty of having another reason. His tall, sketchy looking friend was absent from a few of the earlier trips since he was busy with college, which had left Rantaro and Saihara alone together. Rantaro would have loved those times a bit more had Saihara not freaked out whenever the two strayed from the topic of finding his sisters. He really did wish he knew how to make Saihara more comfortable with him on normal bases, but it always seemed like the other just did not want to be with him alone. (And that may or may not have hurt a bit.) At least with Shinguji there, Saihara's guard was down by a bit.

As the three walked through the forest, Rantaro was reminded of that day so many years ago. He walked along the very path that his feet stepped upon at that moment. The trail was a bit more worn now, but it was still difficult to see. The plants on either side grew thick, covering steep slopes. The tree canopy allowed just enough sunlight through. He recalled that if he walked far enough, he would reach a creek. Back then, after spending a considerable amount of time watching the various creatures around the creek, he headed back the way he had come, finding a small, embezzled shoe along the way. It was when he reached the hotel that he learned his youngest sister had followed him and had yet to return. He still held onto that shoe, praying that it would lead him to the sister who he loved dearly but not enough to have noticed her the one day he should have.

"Saihara?" Shinguji's voice broke the silence, interrupting Rantaro's thoughts. He turned around to see Shinguji looking down the path and-

No. It was not real. He had already lost so many who were precious to him for so long. He could not lose the boy he had fallen for, too.

"Amami, wait." Shinguji caught on his arm, bringing him to a sudden stop. He did not even realize that he sprinting back the way they came. But he needed to go back and find Saihara. If he lost the boy, the guilt and the grief would kill him a thousand times over. 

He struggled against his friend's grip, though to no avail. "Let me go," he growled. If he wasted more time, Saihara might-

"Calm down. If we rush, then we could pass him without knowing. I know we need to find him, but we have to take it slow and carefully examine everything," Shinguji told him.

Rantaro forced himself to suppress the anxiety building up in him. He knew that the best way to find something was to slow down to search. Saihara taught him that much.

The two walked back along the path, calling Saihara's name as much as they could. With each passing second with no reply from the thick forest, a weight grew in the bottom of Rantaro's stomach. He constantly reminded himself to slow down his pace. His throat was starting to feel raw from shouting so much, but even if his voiced failed him, he would not stop calling for that boy until he was found.

Then they stumbled upon a straw hat on the forest floor. Rantaro stooped down to pick it up. Yes, it was the hat he had given Saihara and the same one the detective wore when they went out earlier. He called Saihara's name again as loud as he could, and a second later, there was a response from past the overgrown shrubs.

"Saihara? Where are you?," Rantaro called, already moving towards the boy's voice.

"I fell off the trail," was the response. Rantaro could see how the shrubs beside the path looked like they had been run over and pushed past by a body. "There's a fairly steep part hidden under those plants."

Rantaro and Shinguji cautiously made their was down the slope until they reached ground that was more leveled. There, the vegetation was not as plentiful as the higher parts. Instead, scattered about were decaying leaves, fallen branches, roots, and rocks of varying sizes.

And in the middle of the rather drab scene sat a beauty named Saihara, who kept glancing between them and the ground by his side. "Hey," he greeted them shyly, an awkward smile adorning his face.

Before he even knew what he was doing, Rantaro was kneeling down to pull his friend in the tightest embrace he could manage. "Thank god you're alright!" he exasperated, "I was so, so worried!"

Saihara let out a laugh that made his heart ache as the boy assured him that he was fine. His friend squirmed a bit in his arms, making Rantaro want to hold him tighter, but he let Saihara go just in case he was suffocating the boy. His friend glanced down to his side once more, his face revealing something akin to pity. Curious, Rantaro followed his gaze and saw-

What he saw left him stunned. How else was he supposed to react to the skeletal remains dressed in like a little girl. And by the feet was a small, embezzled shoe.

"... I examined the bones," Saihara whispered after a long pause, as though his words would disturb the resting spirit of the child. Or perhaps he was respecting more than the dead person. He then went on to give a description of the child before she was reduced to bones. Gender, height, health, wealth, and the amount of time she had been dead for. It struck Rantaro as incredible that his detective friend could tells so much from some worn down clothes and bones. But what stood out the most about the dead girl was how similar she was to his own little sister.

When Saihara had finished giving his description, he paused, took a deep breath, and said with care, "I'm sorry, Amami, but I think this is your sister."

Rantaro sat there in silence. How was he supposed to react to such a conclusion to his search for his missing sister? He supposed it would have been natural to deny that the skeleton was his sister or to burst into tears and cry for hours, but he did not feel like either of those actions would really fit his emotions. Inside, he had already accepted the possibility that his sister was dead, had already blamed himself for her disappearance, and had already mourned her a thousand times. Nothing he did would be any different from what he had done before.

He finally settled on asking the one detail Saihara left out: "How did she die?"

His friend said another apology before lifting the skull of the girl to show how it sustained a large amount of damage. "My guess is that she tumbled off of the trail like I did and ended up landing wrong." He then picked up a large, sharp stone from where the skull was. "She most likely hit her head on a rock like this one. Either way, her death would have been fairly quick. She did not suffer."

So his sister died quickly. In a way, that relieved Rantaro of one worry. She did not live very long knowing that her older brother was not going to go back for her until years after her death. That fact was so hilarious that Rantaro almost felt like laughing out loud, right there and then. Almost.

"Thank you, Saihara, for finding her. And you don't have to apologise." His words sounded like empty formalities to his own ears. There was no way to express all of the gratitude he felt for the closer he was always looking for, even if he did not fully expect it be such an ending. He examined his sister's remains carefully. How was he going to carry it all back home in one piece when all he had were his two arms and hands?

Thankfully, Shinguji seemed to have read his mind, for his friend placed a gentle hand on his shoulder. "Should we come back here tomorrow with something to carry her in?" he suggested.

Rantaro took a deep breath, stood up, and nodded. Yes, that was what they would do. They had found her once, so it would not be difficult to find her again. "Let's get going, before it gets dark."

Rantaro and Shinguji were about to leave, but when Rantaro glanced back, he noticed that Saihara was still sitting on the ground. "Saihara? Aren't you coming with?" he asked, puzzled as to why Saihara did not automatically follow them.

Something crossed the boy's face that Rantaro did not recognize right away. "Y-yeah, I'm coming." Rantaro watched as the boy stood up, seeming to wince when he put pressure on one of his legs. He noticed that, as Saihara moved towards them, his friend seemed to... limp?

"Wait," Rantaro commanded, crossing to where Saihara was, "Sit back down for a moment."

Saihara hesitated for a moment before complying. Rantaro knelt down, held the leg that Saihara seemed to be favoring, and rolled up his pant leg to reveal an injured ankle.

"It's swelling," Rantaro stated dumbly. He was not quite sure what they were supposed to do next, but he knew there was no way he was going to let Saihara walk in the condition he was in. Briefly, he wondered why the people he loved always suffered when they traveled with him. Perhaps he was cursed?

"Oh dear, this is no good," Shinguji commented as he examined the injury, "You can't get anywhere in this forest with your ankle like this. We'll have to carry you."

"I can power through it," Saihara protested.

Shinguji raised an eyebrow. "Do you really want to climb up that steep slope the way you are now?"

Saihara opened his mouth, paused for a moment, then dropped his head, defeated. Rantaro offered to carry their injured friend, so Shinguji helped Saihara onto his back. As Rantaro grabbed onto his friend's legs that were on either side of him and stood, he heard Saihara say yet another apology into his ear before wrapping both of his arms around Rantaro and hugging tightly.

That was the story of how Rantaro Amami died the happiest death of all time.

The friends made their way back to their yacht for the night. All the while, Rantaro planned their next course of action. They would buy something to carry the remains of his sister in before going back out into the tropical forest to retrieve her. Well, he would, at least. If Saihara did not want to visit a hospital -an act that he and his uncle seemed to be very against- then Shinguji would take care of him while Rantaro went out to get his sister. Then they would head back home the following day. Once back home, perhaps he would take a break from traveling and enjoy the company of his friends and family there.

The heat from the body he carried on his back seemed too apparent to him as he walked. He guessed the racing heartbeat he felt was his own.

-

Korekiyo was amazed at how all of his friends showed up to the funeral as well as himself to help a friend mourn the death of a sibling that only the Amami family knew. All of them sympathized with Amami's search for his missing sisters and supported his search, but it struck Korekiyo as something special that everyone would cry for the loss as if the girl were their own. He speculated that everyone, even the usually troublesome Ouma who was unusually well behaved, could relate Amami's story to their own: a journey with a bitter end. A loss not realized until you go back to the start. Or perhaps he was looking too far into it.

That evening, all sixteen former classmates arrived to the Amami home still dressed in all black. "It feels like forever since we've all been together like this," Momota mentioned as they all settled down in the living room.

"You're right," Akamatsu agreed, "The last time we were gathered like this was when we celebrated Saihara's graduation, and we all know how that went." Everyone, including Saihara, chuckled at that last comment as they recalled their surprise party they had one year ago. It really was a long time ago.

"Hey, plan on fainting again on us, Sleeping Beauty?" Ouma teased Saihara.

The other let out a laugh. "This time, I'm doing it on purpose." Korekiyo could not tell if that was purely a joke or not, since Saihara really did look tired.

"Let's do a redo of the party," Shirogane suggested, "And we can also celebrate everyone else's graduation and Amami finally staying at home for a while."

The others agreed with the idea and Tojo stood up to grab drinks from god knows where. It was the alcoholic kind, of course. In the meantime, the rest of the friends chatted amongst themselves, and Akamatsu showed off her piano skills, as always.

When Tojo returned with the drinks, there was an applause from everyone as she poured out the beer into glasses. "I think I might regret bringing out actual beer," she muttered to Korekiyo when went up to get a glass from her. She shook her head at the ruckus the others were already making, but Korekiyo noticed that the corners of her mouth were slightly turned up.

Akamatsu approached Korekiyo with an already half empty glass in hand, apparently taking a short break from the piano. "Hey, have you seen Amami and Saihara anywhere?" she asked.

Korekiyo scanned around the room. Ouma was harassing Kiibo, Chabashira and Harukawa were calling out Momota on something, Iruma was doing things that were not worth mentioning, and the others were interacting in whatever odd ways they usually did. But in none of the groups could either Saihara or Amami be found. "No, I haven't seen them since you started playing the piano," he said at last.

"Yeah, neither have I." She paused, took a sip of her beer, and thought for a moment. "Do you think they're doing something..."

Korekiyo raised an eyebrow as she trailed off. "What is the something you propose?"

"I dunno. Hugging, kissing, doing it, finally getting together after forever and a half?"

"You've been spending too much time with Iruma and Ouma," Korekiyo responded, "But I agree that they could very well be doing any of those. Should we go find them?"

Akamatsu drained the last of her beer and set the glass on the piano. She then pulled out her phone. "Heck yes. If they're doing lovey-dovey things, I'm totally gonna record it." Korekiyo was not sure if the other two would actually appreciate being recorded making out, but he kept his mouth shut.

The two found their missing friends in less than a minute. When they went to the back of the house and looked out of the open sliding back doors, Saihara and Amami were there, sitting on the porch, backs turned to them, seeming to be observing the clear night sky. Korekiyo could hear them murmuring things to each other, but he could not tell what they were. One glance at Akamatsu revealed her wearing an odd grin on her face as she busied herself with taking pictures of the scene before them. And even though such a reaction was both fascinating and slightly odd even to Korekiyo, he could not agree with it more.

He always thought each and every person was beautiful in their own little ways. But when those two were together, they shone more beautifully than even the best of starry skies.

-

Kaede Akamatsu was never that impatient of a person. She could tolerate many things: Shirogane's obsession with anime? Yep. Iruma's eccentric manner? Sure. Ouma? Somehow, yes. Especially when it came to her friends, she could take most things. Of course, everyone had their bad days, and it was on those days when Kaede could ever be seen irritated.

That day was one of those days.

"Are you kidding me?!" She knew it was not fair to let out her anger on Saihara, and she would be the first to admit that fact. But walking into his room only to see him neck deep in papers that he did not even have to do made her boil over.

Saihara turned with a start towards her. "Wha- Akamatsu?!" he exclaimed, "How did you- did my uncle let you in?"

Kaede did not bother to answer her friend, since he would have already known he was right. Instead, she stormed over to the desk and slammed her hand atop a mountain of papers. "What's up with this." She said that more as a demand for an answer rather than a question.

"It's just the paperwork for the cases I'm working on. It only looks like a lot. It's really not that much," Saihara assured her.

However, Kaede would not let it rest at that. "And how many cases are you taking on at once?" she interrogated. When her friend did not reply right away, she asked, "Is it more than three?" Reluctantly, Saihara nodded. "So let me get this straight; You're working your ass off even though your uncle would readily take some of your load and we've already established what happens when you over do it."

Saihara opened his mouth to argue, but he shut it and only nodded again, defeated.

Kaede let out a sigh. Honestly, Saihara was too much for his own good. "You know, we're all worried about you. After our drinking party last month, you never seemed to go out except for your job. You don't even respond to our calls and messages that often."

"Sorry about not contacting you guys that much, but I'm still alive, so there's no need to worry about me." Saihara spread out his arms to show that he was there.

"Not for long." Kaede could clearly see the bags under Saihara's eyes, the shallowness of his cheeks, and a complexion that was even paler than usual. "Why are you even overloading yourself anyways?"

She could see a slight blush forming on Saihara's cheeks as he did not answer. "It's Amami, isn't it?" Kaede guessed. He nodded. Of course. It was always Amami with him. Kaede let out a heavy sigh. "What happened this time?"

"He didn't do anything," Saihara told her, "I just... I don't think I can really go on with him being close but so far away."

Kaede waited a moment to see if Saihara had more to add to his riddle-like statement. When he remained silent, she said, "Just one month ago, you two were on your way to getting closer. I mean, you traveled across the globe together. You both looked happy, too. It really wouldn't hurt if you'd just confess to him, you know. Have you seen the way he looks at you?"

"I have noticed that he seems different around me compared to you guys, but... I just don't want to get my hopes up. And anyways, if I confess, then I might hurt him."

God, this boy was so damn cryptic and frankly melodramatic. "How could you of all people hurt him?"

"If he turns me down, then there's no way we could return to how we were before. If he accepts, then there's no way he could stay happy. He told me he loves working with kids when we had that party, but it's physically impossible for me to give him that. He's adventurous and outspoken. He's going to travel around the world, and he's going to realize how much time he wasted on a guy who can give him nothing if we become a couple."

With each word that left Saihara's mouth, Kaede grew even more frustrated with her friend. "Then isn't you who will get hurt?" she snapped, "Look, while you're holing yourself up, Amami's been the one to worry about you the most. Every time he's able to, he has his phone out, waiting for you to pick up. He's always wondering if you've been getting enough food and rest. He looks forty years older because he's been stressing about you. So if you want to talk about hurting him, then consider his feelings for once!"

Saihara just sat there, his mouth wide open. Kaede wished she could have said those words in a nicer tone, but oh well. She told the boy "Don't kill yourself" over her shoulder before leaving the room. She had enough of Saihara's foolishness.

As she waited at a bus stop for a bus that was not going to be there for a solid thirty minutes, she got a call from Amami, which she answered.

"How is-"

"He's dying again," she spat out before Amami could finish his sentence, "I don't care what you do, but I want nothing to do with your stupid romance until you finally figure it out." She hung up before Amami could respond. Kaede sat back on the bench at the stop and reflected on how much she wished a bad rehearsal would not affect her mood.

-

As Shuichi backed into a small parking space, his uncle made sure the police were on their way. There was no way they were going to let this guy get away. The duo climbed out of the car and observed the apartment building. It was small and run down and seemed to have a couple bullet holes in its walls and doors. Shuichi guessed that the interior was, unfortunately, not much better. He glanced at his records and notes and checked with his uncle on everything one last time before throwing the papers into the car and locking the vehicle. He then set an audio recording watch he was wearing to start.

The two made their way up to the second floor, Shuichi's heart picking up its pace with each step. But he had to remain calm. If his panicked state showed, then that could cost him dearly.

Shuichi found the apartment door of their man in question. He took a deep breath and knocked, waiting few moments before someone answered it.

The man who stood before him looked like the last person who would be suspected of being a part of a major drug trafficking scandal, but alas, he ended up being the most suspicious. And as unfortunate as it was sometimes, when Shuichi made a conclusion, it was almost never wrong. "Yes?" said the man.

"H-hello," Shuichi struggled to greet. He mentally kicked himself. "I heard you have some stuff for sale. Shall we break the ice?" He hoped he was using that secret phrase correctly. Actually, he hoped that was actually the secret phrase, or if this guy used a secret phrase at all. If not, then he was probably even more dumb-looking.

Thankfully, the man seemed to understand. "Hey, keep it down," he told Shuichi in a low voice, "I'll meet you outside. Just hold on a moment."

Just then, a young girl from inside called for her father, and the man quickly turned to go back inside. So he has a family, Shuichi thought. Of course, that moment was not the time to be overwhelmed with guilt. He could let that happen when he was done with the case and could afford to question his morals.

The man reemerged from the apartment and suggested that they did their business somewhere else. Shuichi and his uncle agreed and they followed the man out of the apartment building.

Once outside, police cars could already be seen coming towards the apartment. The man turned to face the duo, his eyes wide. "We should hurry and leave." His voice sounded frantic.

"No, here should be just fine," Shuichi told him.

The man's eyes grew wider as the boy's words sunk in. He was definitely panicking. "Wha- Are you serious?"

Shuichi's uncle told the man his crime and reminded him of his rights, though the felon seemed to still be in shock. "No, you- you have the wrong guy!" he insisted.

Shuichi shook his head. "All evidence points to you. And the display you gave us was more than enough proof."

"Shut up!" the man screamed at him, "Shut up shut up shut up shut up!" Over and over, the man repeated those words as he raced up to Shuichi, his hands balled with one pulled back. Before he could react Shuichi felt a hard impact on his jaw as the ground rushed up to meet him. He briefly reflected on how much his friends had told him to take care of himself. If he had, then maybe he would still be standing after taking a right hook to the face.

Shuichi rolled over to see his uncle wrestling with the man, eventually pinning the man's arm behind him. A few policemen were already running up to help. Their culprit was caught.

When the police finally managed to calm down the man to the point where they could put handcuffs on him and lead him to the car, Shuichi's uncle went over to help his nephew up. His uncle offered to take care of the rest, which Shuichi gladly accepted. He had no clue how to tell the man's family that he just arrested the husband and father. Or more like his head was too messed up to even think about dealing with the case at the moment. He would follow it up at the man's trial. Shuichi stopped the recording on the watch and took it off to give to his uncle. His uncle said that he would take a bus home when he was done, so Shuichi headed to his car. He needed to rest. He needed to think. He needed to hide his eyes from the weight of everything he had done. He needed to get the image of that man's hateful, vengeful face out of his mind.

He needed to drown himself in the demons of his headspace.

-

Rantaro climbed the narrow staircase to the second floor of the small house. Saihara's uncle had let him in, telling him that Saihara was recovering from a slightly more violent case they had tackled earlier that afternoon. Rantaro was not quite sure what the older man meant by "slightly more violent," but he decided it was no good either way. The anxiety of it only became worse as he remembered what Akamatsu told him the day before over the phone. Saihara was probably not okay.

He knocked on Saihara's bedroom door. "Hey, Saihara," he called gently, "It's me, Amami. Can I come in?" When there was no response, he tried again a few more times. Alas, there was nothing, so he tried the handle to find that it was unlocked. He let himself in, concern for his friend building up.

Saihara's room looked like a tornado had passed through. Scattered everywhere were papers, folders, and random articles of clothing. The bed was unmade, an empty drawer that probably once held clothing was on the floor, separated from the overturned drawer cabinet that it probably belonged to, and a chair that most likely should have been with the desk in one corner of the room looked to have been thrown to the opposite corner. In fact, the desk looked to be the only thing that was untouched.

"What the hell happened here?" Rantaro wondered aloud. As far back as he could remember, when he visited Saihara before, the room was orderly and organized without a single misplaced paper in sight, which the young detective always seemed to have a lot of. Was it possible that Saihara caused the mess? Or perhaps...

Rantaro decided to check the room to see if, by some miracle, Saihara was there. And sure enough, the boy was under the desk, his knees drawn up and his face buried in them in a fetal position. Saihara was wearing a black baseball cap and had earbuds in his ears. Rantaro could faintly hear the music blasting from the earbuds.

Rantaro knelt down and removed one earbud from the other's ear, causing him to lift his head up. "Hey," Rantaro greeted awkwardly, "Sorry, I let myself in."

Once Saihara seemed to recognize who Rantaro was, he pulled his hat down in a way that covered his eyes. "O-oh. Hey," he muttered, taking out the other earbud and turning off his music. However, he made no move to get out from under the desk.

Rantaro sighed. He was hoping to have at least a normal conversation with his friend, but it seemed like that was not possible as they were. "Come out from under there," he told Saihara, trying to coax him out. The other remained an unresponsive ball.

There was no point in continuing whatever competition of stubbornness they were playing, so Rantaro reached forward, tried his best to wrap both of his arms around Saihara, and dragged the boy out from under the desk. "Hey- What are you-" Saihara sputtered, though he seemed stop functioning completely when Rantaro picked him up bridal style.

Rantaro carried the boy over to the bed and sat on it, loosening his hold on Saihara so his friend would be resting on his lap. He then removed the hat and tossed it over his shoulder. "Now tell me what's up," he cooed.

Saihara did not respond for many long moments, and Rantaro was scared that he had done something terribly wrong. Finally, the other spoke. "...Give me back my hat." Saihara's voice was naturally soft and slightly high, sounding as shy as its owner. However, in that moment, his voice had a hint of a growl, like a puppy trying to be scary. It would have been completely adorable and not intimidating in the slightest had Rantaro not had a traumatic experience with a puppy digging its teeth into his hand when he tried petting it.

Even so, Rantaro was not backing down. "You're just going to hide your eyes behind it again, right?" Again, no response from Saihara, so he took it as being correct. "There's no need to hide your eyes. It makes it harder to do your work, anyways." He gently hugged Saihara with one arm as he used his other hand to ruffle the boy's hair.

"You always treat me like a kid," Saihara pouted.

Did he? Rantaro only treated Saihara as he thought he should treat a friend, but he supposed that there was always a possibility that his way of showing friendship was not so different than how he treated children. "Then how should I treat you?" he asked. Saihara said no words, but he buried his face into Rantaro's chest. Rantaro prayed that he would not hear how his heartbeat accelerated from zero to a million in that one instant. "You tell me not to treat you like a kid, but then you go and do this," Rantaro muttered under his breath, not realizing he did so until Saihara pushed away a bit. He cursed himself for the slip up.

However, it was that slight distance that allowed him to see something. He placed a hand on Saihara's forehead and the other on his own. "You're burning up a bit," Rantaro said to him, "Your face is bright red, too. All of the stress you've dealt with is going to make you sick again. Rest a bit."

Saihara gently slapped Amami's hand away as he bowed his head. Amami felt a bit guilty for thinking that the boy looked really cute when he hid his flushed face. "I'm fine," Saihara told him.

"Clearly you're not," Rantaro shot back, "Here, lay down while I-"

"Do you like me?"

In that moment, Rantaro's racing heart suddenly stopped. He stared at his friend, the boy's ears and even his neck being completely red. God, was Saihara adorable. But could he really tell him that aloud?

Rantaro started to answer, "I mean, you're a really good friend-"

"But is that all there is?" Saihara persisted, his voice cracking. Curiously, Rantaro bent over a bit to see his friend's face.

"Why are you-" Rantaro's voice caught in his throat. Saihara's face was twisted into the most pained and desperate expression he had ever seen from the boy.

"... You've got me," Rantaro admitted at last, "I... I never knew when -or even if- I should tell you how I really felt, but now you have me cornered. Saihara, for the longest time, I've liked you. Like, a lot. I really like you." This was not how he expected his confession to go, but then again, he had no idea what he was expecting.

"... Is what you're saying true?" Saihara's voice was barely audible, as hesitant and cautious as it was. Rantaro confirmed his words. Of course they were true, albeit a bit poorly strung together. "Then... is it okay if I... feel the same way about you...?" Rantaro could feel how tense he was. "Can I really... should I... for someone as perfect as you?"

Rantaro took a deep breath. "Shuichi." The other seemed to freeze. "Shuichi," he started again, "Look at me." The boy did, slowly. Soon, golden eyes dangerously close to bursting into tears were revealed. The sight hurt Rantaro's heart. He was the reason behind those tears. He cupped Saihara's cheek with his hand. "I'm not perfect, and you know this. I'm bad at reading people, and I'm not as observant as I should be. And I know that you also have some flaws, like how you're bad at being open about your feelings. But despite your setbacks, in my eyes, you're the most beautiful human I have ever seen. No one can compare to you, and that's why I want you. You're the only one that I've ever wanted so badly."

"But- but-!" Saihara was starting to cry. "You have so much going for you. You could easily get a cute wife, have children, and live a better life without m-"

"No life is good without you," Rantaro intervened, "What I told you has always and will always hold true."

At that point, Saihara completely broke down. If he was trying to say anything, it was drowned out by his own tears. Rantaro held the boy with both arms as he kissed his forehead. Over and over again, he whispered Saihara's name. "Shuichi, Shuichi, Shuichi." He loved the way the name felt as it slipped past his tongue. It was the name of the one he loved, after all.

When Saihara had calmed down, he leaned against Rantaro's chest, seeming to have tired himself out. "Sorry," he meekly apologized, "I don't know what came over me."

"It's fine," Rantaro comforted him, kissing his hair, "I heard you had a rough day today."

Shuichi nodded. "But now it's fine." He paused before looking up at Rantaro, his eyes red from crying, though there was a spark of curiosity in them. "Say, you said that you've liked me for a while, right? How long is 'a while?'"

Rantaro hesitated before giving a reply. The answer was too embarrassing. "... Ever since our first summer together. You know, when Shinguji came with and I freaked out because you went out early to go find my sister."

Saihara chuckled. "Wasn't that back in out first year in high school?" Another pause. "... Though I probably shouldn't be talking..."

"What? Why?" Rantaro asked, "How long did you love me for?"

"... Ever since you told me about your book collection for the first time..."

Rantaro tried to recall an even like that, though it was difficult, since something like that seemed so insignificant. But then he remembered a time when an awkward, nervous boy approached him to ask about a book he was reading. "Wasn't that the first day we met?" he laughed. Saihara flushed completely as he tried to hide it into Rantaro's shirt. "So all of this time we were running circles around each other when we could have just been up front with each other," Rantaro muttered, shaking his head at how silly the entire situation sounded out loud. He gently squeezed Saihara. "Sorry for not letting you know for so long."

"No, I should be apologizing for not properly acknowledging your feelings earlier," said Saihara, "I want to make it up to you somehow."

This surprised Rantaro. Why did Saihara feel that way? However, he already had an idea in mind, though he did feel a bit guilty for taking advantage of the situation. "How about saying my name?"

Saihara's eyes widened. "What?"

"Well, I already said yours, and we're closer now, so you're pretty much out of excuses," Rantaro explained.

"B-but... That's so embarrassing!" the boy exclaimed.

"Yeah, that would be taking things a bit quickly, huh? Though it's only the two of us here," Rantaro pointed out.

"M-my uncle is still downstairs, isn't he?"

"But here's not here with us right now, now is he?"

Saihara seemed to consider Rantaro's argument before giving in. Slowly and cautiously, he leaned in closer to Rantaro's ear and whispered a phrase that made the young man's heart flutter:

"I love you, Rantaro."

Without thinking, Rantaro leaned down to press his lips against Saihara's. When he realized what he was doing, he knew that the young detective was probably going to stop functioning afterwards, so he savored the kiss while it lasted. After moments that would never be enough to satisfy Rantaro, Saihara pushed the young man away, his face such a deep shade of red that Rantaro was afraid that he would explode. "Sorry," said the young man, "Was that... Not okay?"

"No, no, that was- it was fine," Saihara assured him. Which caused him to give the boy another quick kiss.

Rantaro figured that they both were acting like awkward teenagers all over again, but he also knew that their relationship was only just beginning. They had all the time in the world to make up for all of their years of pinning and say everything that they kept secret. After all, there was no need to hide their feelings anymore.

**Author's Note:**

> Did you actually read any of this? Don't worry, I don't blame you if you didn't and just fell asleep on the spacebar or something. But if you were actually crazy enough to read this story, I commend you. Thank you for reading!


End file.
